Alongside our post-adoption social worker, Moose’s local authority and our own, we started to look at different therapies to start helping him further on his journey through life. We were recommended the BUSS model. We hadn’t heard of it, but we trusted the professionals in our lives, so we went for it!
We were also recommended more intensive therapies, but we researched these, and we felt that for where Moose is at, he wouldn’t be able to access these fully, due to the foundations not being concreted in. This is why we started with BUSS hoping it would allow us to access future therapies more fully.
“Playing games and doing activities designed to fill in gaps in essential patterns of movement, missed in infancy and early childhood, within these loving relationships has a significant effect on a child’s bodily regulation.” bussmodel.org
The hope was BUSS would allow Moose to be more aware of his body, help with his regulation and fill in some fundamental gaps that were missing from his early life. Sometimes he slouches when he sits, he bumps into things, and trips over things that aren't there. From conversations with our BUSS practitioner we realised that sometimes he was having to put so much effort into just sitting straight at dinner, and keeping his head upright, how could he even start to think about holding his fork, being polite, chewing his food, realising when he is full, processing the noises around him, and putting food into his mouth! So much to think about generally, but the initial task of just sitting there is tough, because of early milestones being missed in building his core, for example, making sitting up, harder.
A huge box tick for us is that BUSS is parent and child-led. During our 4 months of doing BUSS, we only had our practitioner visit the house three times. So for Moose, it’s very unobtrusive, he doesn't have to have someone visit the house weekly, or miss any of school or go to a new place. In between the visits we have fortnightly check-ins on teams for just the parents and we send videos every now and again to his practitioner so that she can see how he is doing. She feeds back to us with tweaks we could make. We also get reports after each video call, which include a summary of how he is doing, a reminder of what to do and any alterations we should make, and handy video guides for each game.
So BUSS focuses on two areas, the tactile and vestibular systems, and there is a range of games associated with each. One of our games was to blow bubbles into a cup of milk, through a straw. (Note that these activities are tailored by practitioners for each child and the outcomes will be different).
We don’t know if Moose was weaned correctly, when asked to blow bubbles on day one he could for a second or so. By the third attempt, his mouth was open over the straw and there was a lot of saliva. Over the weeks, he has now been able to blow with a tight lip around the straw for an extended period of time, just through practice. We also do other versions, blowing bubbles, blowing a feather across the table, blowing shower foam off the edge of the bath, to try and get the round mouth ‘oo’ shape.
The changes we saw over these few weeks were not limited here. Moose has always been described by everyone as smiley. But now when he smiles his entire face smiles, including his cheeks and eyes, not just his mouth. His speech is clearer, his speech doesn’t deteriorate as he tires, he chews food better and he is able to pull faces in the mirror. He has essentially found, used and strengthened muscles in his face that a baby would use when weaning or playing little peekaboo games with a parent.
Alongside games like the above, we played games to include tummy time, awareness of the body and games to help him be aware of objects in his hands for example. Moose has found a stillness, he can be more in the moment. He doesn’t bump into things as often. He is more receptive to holding your hand without fidgeting to let go.
We noticed within a week of starting Moose engaged in ‘baby’ type activities. Making noises and giggling, and attempting to make others giggles, like a baby would. Within about six weeks this had moved into a ‘toddler’ phase. Demanding independence, trying to do everything on his own, and finding manipulative behaviours! When Moose hugs you now, he properly hugs you. His arms wrap around your neck and he pulls you in closer. Something has been unlocked within as if we have filled in the gaps of so many foundations.
We have found BUSS very playful and accessible. During our first session, we did all of the games with him, so he got used to us all doing him, we weren’t all just watching him. We were given a licence to play, and we have slowly found our versions of these games, which work for Moose, we send our new version on WhatsApp to his practitioner and she messages back if it’s working or hitting the aims or how we could work it around to help.
The biggest thing, I feel, we have got from BUSS though, is a stronger sense of play and connection. There are many a video we have tried to send of us attempting to commando crawl across the room (really hard to do by the way - try it!) where we just end up rolling with laughter, and he is so happy! It doesn’t matter if we haven’t quite achieved what we want to achieve! Moose doesn’t respond well to ‘demands’ and hates it if he can’t do something or does something wrong. What we have found wonderful with BUSS is that he thinks it is all a game, and has no idea if he has done it ‘right or wrong’. Sometimes we have a run of focus for about ten minutes, sometimes it’s 20 seconds and we move on. There is no pressure for a set amount of time for each exercise or game each day.
Moose is developing his own real sense of humour - learning to make adults laugh, he seems more genuinely happy, it comes from deep down, and almost finding it harder, or maybe by choice, to cover up when he is not happy. Anger isn’t his first response to situations any more and it takes longer to go from zero to one hundred.
During the adoption process we were asked so often, “But you won’t get his first steps” “You won’t get the first word” and “Won’t you feel sad you have missed out on all firsts”. No, was always my answer - and it is true. This was not something we focussed on and never really became part of why we wanted a child. But BUSS has given us firsts. One of the most notable was a day where Moose and I were at the zoo, and he jumped, from two feet to two feet. I had often seen him try, and do an odd hop, or just be unable to work out how to do it, and then get frustrated and leave it. But now he is running, jumping, jumping off of kerbs, benches and climbing over things more successfully. I got to see his first jump. He won bronze at school sports day for jumping. He has become so much more aware of his body through BUSS, his core is stronger, allowing him to do more physically.
My view is that, as with all types of therapy, some work for some and some work for others. BUSS has made huge improvements to Moose’s life, and given us more as a family, I would say a stronger connection between Moose and I due to all the low-stakes, pressure-free games, that would often end in giggles. He is very sensory, and many of the games tap into his sensory input so I think he really enjoyed them for this too.
There is a BUSS parent support group which was lovely to join. We heard from people on round 1 one of their BUSS journey, some about to start and some who have done it a few times. It’s lovely to hear others’ ideas of what they have done to make a game fit into their lives, or how to incorporate it into a routine or tweak it to suit their child. BUSS is a commitment, we aimed to do it daily, realistically it was every other day, but we also went through phases of a week where we just couldn’t get the time to do it. School days are short of free time where you can add these games in. But other times, commando crawling to get a t-shirt from the drawer, lying on his front to play the iPad or blowing bubbles off the edge of the bath, fitted in nicely and easily.
To find out more visit bussmodel.org
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